Dreams and what to make of it

I had the funkiest dream.

It was the end of the world, and we were in a modern space ship. Probably just waiting to die. I was with my wife (yes, I had a wife). Really beautiful but she was dying of cancer. (very tragic).


Her hair was falling and her body was weak. I was bringing her to a lounge where she could lay down more comfortably.

Then, a bunch of people came over to where we were and started making a ruckus. I was pretty mad because that moment felt really intimate when we were siting down side by side. Her lying on my shoulders and all.

So I made some signs hinting them that they should leave. But they did not get it. So I screamed at them. And they left.

And I woke up after that.

Really wonder what that means. Maybe it's a reflection of my love life. Strangers coming in the way and spoiling everything. Hahahaha. Or it's a sign that I really need to get a life.

Incognito

I totally forgotten about this place. This place used to be fun. Used to be where we gathered. Used to be where we catch up on our lives. I like this place. I find it so hard to find a place to vent things out lately, until I found this place again.


 Everyone is watching us these days. Waiting for us to fall and make mistakes. And I find it more frustrating that there are people out there talking about us like they know who we are. People who we don't even bother asking their name. Babbling about us. And we thought we could trust them. How foolish.


I find it sad that we can't go back to the past. I liked it there. Things were much simpler. Mistakes were not made yet. Regrets not felt. Love not lost.


I find myself going back to the past again and again. There is something there I'm missing. Like a huge chunk of me. Which I left it back there. I wish I could get it back. And feel it again.


I definitely miss her. I miss being with her. I miss having just her by my side no matter what the odds. I took it for granted and now all is lost. Though it hurts like hell, we all move on. You do, she did and I probably will... someday. But I don't know why I keep finding myself reminiscing about it. Every sad song that I hear, it's about her. Oh how I wish those were merrier tunes that I'll sing to.


I guess I'll just keep going back. Until I find the day I look back up.


Hopefully by the time someone reads this, we are all happier and have moved on. No matter how hard the notion seems now. I'll miss her for sure but I can't stop here. It's unfair to lock her down, and it's unfair to lock my heart out... I'm sure I'll find someone. For better or for worse. She did. Guess it'll be my turn.

Time don turn back

i am now emoing for the stupid thing that i had done last few days.. i will make it a lesson well learn for me as it cause me alot this time.. i didnt know that sadness can be up to this level..

idk whether is there anyone reading this blog or not but if u do remember this.. TOLERATE!!! even though u will be eating shit at that time but that pile of shit is definitely gonna be bigger if u did not tolerate.. it took me a hard way to learn that giving in is a very important thing to do.. i hope that u do not need to be in my shoe..

signing off..

X'mas!!!

Hello there,

This is my first time celebrating Christmas at Sabah... First of all i thought it would be a great place to celebrate x'mas as majority of the ppl here are christian..

So when the time come...

10
9
8
7
6
5
4
3
2
1

MERRY CHRIS..... OMG seriously.. everyone is in their house sleeping i guess.. it felt like normal other day only.. what a let down..

However, i did had a great time with my frens.. eventhough i didnt manage to go to THE CURVE.. (stupid alex call me and telling me they are playing foam at there like nobody business)

So for those that reading how was ur christmas? did u have fun?

IM READY!!!

this week been has been a hell of a week.. assignment, mid term bla bla bla... it seems like im much more busier compare to last sem eventhough i have less credit hour this time... (WATS THE POINT OF HAVING CREDIT HOUR THEN!!!)

apart from that im having my APK next monday.. JENG JENG JENG... WTF is tat?? @_@
its a course we study how to do a business... which include doing the product, business proposal, bla bla bla.. that not the point.. the point is im selling my PRODUCT!!! which is POTATO ICE CREAM!!! hahaha.. 1st time malaysia going to have that ok.. hahaha.. CREATIVE LE!!! XD

back to the product again.. its putting mashed potato on an ice cream cone... we also manage to get sponsor from nestle and breeze magazine.. NOT ONLY THAT!!! The breeze magazine might wanna take our picture for their COVER!!! hahahha... imbaness..

SO so so so SO.... come and visit my store la.. wat summor.. can eat potato ice cream, got lucky draw and free breeze magazine summor.. its good enough from a 2m x 2m store ok.. The most hilarious thing is the organiser did ask sponsor from nestle company but the nestle choose to sponsor us instead... TAKE THAT LOSER!!! hahaha..

to sum it all its gonna be another HELL OF A WEEK for next week again... pray hard that it wont rain for that 2 days.. wish me luck..

Busy busy busy..

Wah, this sem has been considerably busier than the previous ones. And I was more involved with extra curricular activities the previous sems as compared to now.

It's like, test, test, if not test, assignment, if not assignment, long report, then long report and test, report and assignment, report and test, blah blah blah.

And then there's this lecturer asking me to be her research assistant.

I just gaped up at her like a goldfish.

So busy these days. Regretting slacking the first few weeks of the sem. Haiz.. We're so busy until I don't really have time to spend with my boyfriend anymore. He has his final year project, and I'm up to my(fevered) nose-bridge with assignments and tests and lab and all.

Music is my coffee, the internet my entertainment, fast food my sustenance, and God my safety net and rope.

With all these stuff on my mind and the usual cheong-hey ness of new drivers I had quite a few near-accidents and one little accident(to my poor car's signal lamp). I YET LIVE!!! *thank God, wipe forehead*

Is everybody okay?? Handling school well?

Holidays!

Hey yo! Holidays are here and it is getting really exciting to have a week off.

This time around, I have a completely task. Instead of resting, I plan to study. Why? Because I have not studied at all since the start of university. I've been skipping classes so much that I don't really know what I am studying (though I doubt I will know better if I went for classes). Still, its fine. I took this conscious decision and would have to go through with it. I've been floating through these 6 weeks and its time to be grounded again.


Anyways, Uni has been fun. I've been to so many places for the past 6 weeks and I enjoy moving around and meeting new faces and places.

Though now, having more responsibilities is also a bitch. If only I don't procrastinate, I would be fine. I'm not busy, I'm just occupied. There is a difference you see... I still have a choice when it comes to making decisions. I just choose to do things that I like. Which is all good. At least I am happy and contented. Isn't that what life is about? To be happy. =)


Still, I know one day when I will have to choose. I just pray that when I finally make that decision, I will not look back and start wondering about the "what ifs?". I want to be able to not look back and regret, because for now, I'm just preparing for that moment to come. Hoping I will be strong enough to make that decision. The sole decision which will probably cause a drastic change in my life. Hooorahhhhh!!

Not that anyone reads this anymore, its fun to type stuff out once in awhile. Take care guys! I totally miss hanging out with all of you. =)